Letter From My Mum

Hello Roxana Faye, it is good to hear from you, if a little surprise.  Not sure how you knew my email address. At the moment, I'm not well I'm in bed or on top of the bed because  feel weak, aching all over including arms and coughing.  Little appetite either and I have the other problem of acid reflux that plagues me.  

I also have fibromyalgia or chronic fatigue syndrome.  So I was lying down a lot before this virus only started yesterday though G has been unwell for a week. 

I do go out at least 2 or 3 times a week to town; my usual a bit of shopping then coffee.  All the things I thought I might do, once retired, it doesn't happen because of lack of energy.  I'm not bothered about drinking alcohol either.  I end up with terrible acid reflux so it takes away any enjoyment and the pubs we used to go in have closed down and it has just changed since lockdown and never returned to what it was.  I hate all the high-rise flats being built in town.

The city centre has been destroyed - all on purpose - it is being turned into a student village.  Fargate is atrocious.  

I spend a lot of time looking at YouTube. 

I'm glad you managed to get a holiday in Turkey.  I am not surprised about the bathroom because when Emma said you could have a new bathroom I said make sure you get a decent one but I said she would put you just a shower cubicle in because it's cheaper.  I think a woman wants a bath though I think men go for showers but at least you have a new bath even if it's not as big as you would like.  It was meant to be for you to move there, it seems: have you got a view? 

We can often look back and think how we would do things differently.  At the time, though, I think there is a reason for our actions and circumstances play a big part.  Yes, you tried a lot of things but, as I've said before, and it took me til late on life to find out...if you try too hard you don't get anywhere it seems to work in retrograde.  People who don't try get on.  I've seen it so many times. 

I've seen some of those Love Rat videos where women went to Gambia or somewhere and found the man only wanted a British Passport and left once he had his naturalization.  I have watched quite a few of those.  There are many cases of women being in a cyber relationship with someone who does not exist!  

I don't watch any TV at all now and cancelled my sky subscription after 19 years!  I just watch YouTube on my tablet.  

It is lucky for Z that Linton is paying for her flat.   Those flats are very expensive and also private rental.  Whereabouts is she living?  

I need to sort out some more stuff for the charity shop again once I'm feeling better.  That's where I saw dad at Christmas in the Stroke shop and I was going to look at the Cambridge Collective food hall as he came around the corner.  It is aimed at students not older people.  Everything now is students. 

I will sign off now time to re-fill my hot water bottle.  It's cold again.  

Goodnight I'm coughing like Billy-o. 

Mum.  Xxx💓🏵️🪻 🌷🌸

Oh I have fibromyalgia as well always aching and tired with no energy it's awful. The other day I couldn't even keep my eyes open I didn't get out of bed for days. I often have days like that today was one but I was on the sofa all day. I felt exhausted all yesterday from the walk on Saturday. I had to wait in today for the council gas engineer but he came quite early. I had decided to feed magpies that hang around next to my flat I can see out of the side window where my sofa is I'm the only one who has side windows in my row as I'm on the end of the row.

No, no views here it's blocked by trees but I don't want to see across the valley of maisonettes and other depressing elements to make me feel more depressed about ending up stuck living here. I don't understand why I always end up living in shit places I don't like. It's tolerable here but depressing for me as I would rather be the other side of town Hillsborough way it's more where I felt comfortable and local shops here there is none I hate that. Newfield green it's impossible as all hill very steep hill to get back again. Townend is closer but there's nothing at townend except a tiny Sainsbury's, post office and the tram
And a couple of takeaways
I also get acid reflux due to my medication and it's TERRIBLE at times it's like fire coming up into my chest and throat so bad it's like I can even feel it in my ears! If I don't get those Rennie tablets or whatever they're called it's hell and they only work such a short period of time

Oh I didn't have your email address I emailed Baltimore Fats to ask him for it
He said he had not heard from you in a long time and you never replied his last messages on FB messenger so he had been concerned about you and hoped you was ok .
I just wanted the email because to actually WRITE on paper and walk to the post office felt so exhausting as I had just finished writing Cookie and that was a feat in itself I hope to go post office this week but it's never guaranteed even though it's only at Townend plus the weather is bad again
I only like to go out really if jasmine comes for me in the car but that's not often at all.
She's no longer with Ramir and that's permanent
She lives opposite side of Gleadless Rd where the big houses are.. I literally live across the Rd from house Grandad grew up in. An African family live in it now. I've seen all the kids jumping on trampoline in the front garden 🏡

Miquelle was ill off school for a week I had to take her to children hospital. She had tonsillitis. Couldn't get anywhere with the GP.
I'm sick of Drs and GPs and reception staff trying to dictate to me when I phone up for my repeat prescription every month. Now they're telling me I HAVE to have a annual health check up or they won't issue my medication which is out of line. The GP can't even prescribe what I'm on it was the hospital psychiatrist but the RECEPTIONIST at the GP is saying I HAVE to have annual health check to continue with my medication so I have to be weighed And  have blood pressure and bloods taken. I've refused for over six months but they're not letting me refuse any more. It's made me so angry. I don't want them dictating to me that I have to go to have check ups I don't want.

I would love in one of those high rise flats in town a two bedroom one, some of them are two bedrooms. I would prefer to live in one of those than where I live now. I just don't understand WHY HERE??

I'm on mutual exchange council pages on FB and you should see the places somewhere folk have they all want to swap three bedrooms for four bedrooms mostly and nobody wants two bed flats even the folk in two bed flats wants three bed houses.....
It's INCREDIBLE what these folk have to swap ... They have new builds with ensuite bathrooms and all decked out with flooring and brand new kitchens and bathrooms top spec not like what I have at all...
They have huge gardens and it's not good enough for them OR not the area they want to be in so they want to swap. It's crazy. It's shocking though how beautiful their homes are the council gave them brand new when I've always lived in crap.
Here is ok inside except it's TINY if only I could pick it up and put it at Hillsborough

Im always on YouTube but I've listened to it all now. Eric Dubay, Feed your Mind,  Your Lunch Break, Mag Bitter Truth still makes me laugh ... I lie in wait for Forever Conscious Research Channel weekly members only streams...last night's was 7 hours long...
But it feels like nothing else to watch on YouTube it's all old news now. Where do you go with the information now? I'm so terribly bored of life.

Nobody is living yet at Edward Street and I've been gone eight months. I had some of Leo's lot look through the windows the other day.

A couple of them were not well with pneumonia one Mark said it's scarred his lungs and now has to have further intervention. Leo never got it though, he seems strong as an Ox.

Leo says he misses me and wants me to visit but Mark said don't go. He said even he won't go there anymore as it's all tramps sat in there and totally stinks and he's sure he caught the Pneumonia there.

I said I wouldn't go visit anyway if pneumonia is going around! I won't even visit Mark because I'm scared to catch it (he's the one who's lungs are scarred now from it.)
PLUS if I need to 'spend a penny' I can't use the loo there!!! So I won't go to Leo's again to visit

Miquelle just got home. 11pm. She's out all the time doing dance and theatre she even goes to Leeds and Wakefield on her own for things. I don't have the energy to take her so it's lucky she's independent and streetwise enough I mostly just hate her having to walk back from Townend in the dark down that long Gleadless Rd. It's spooky. One side is all trees other side houses set back of the Rd with locked gates and driveways.

I really don't know exactly where Zaniyah will be living. Miquelle said Zaniyah is spending the summer in Preston still as she works in a bar and coming to Sheffield in September until about August/September next year when she will return to Preston for a final year

The two of them Dej and Zaniyah are lucky. Linton pay a lot of Z expenses and Dej has Vivip, she still pays his phone bill and I think he will inherit of her when the time comes in the future. It's only Miquelle who has nobody but me.

I just threw a huge bag of Miquelle old clothes in the bin. I couldn't be bothered to do anything else. It took me days upon days to sort out her mess in bedroom and her drawers and clothes rail.

What is Cambridge Collective Food Hall for? Is it free?

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